ides of augustus : I
AT THE DOOR

He said it with finality,
you must step across that threshold
where no-one may follow.
Even as I denied the existence
of the traveler, of the threshold, of what might be beyond,
I stepped up to the door.

Here I make the pronouncement-
and Here I draw the line-
and Here I stand, forever removed.
I step through knowingly
willingly
finally.

Understand -
half of me remains forever skeptic.
Half of me believes completely.

A blind man points at a mirror reflection,
insisting it's real.

I watch you shrink away.
How many times can you withdraw, reapproach?
We are trapped in this web together
even as we drift apart.
I feel your fear wash over me,
reminding me over and over.

Because of you
I set myself the challenge.
Failure is not an option.

Understand,
I recognize our dichotomy.
Understand,
you are both real and unreal, you are
a part of me, apart from me,
revealer of secrets-
yours, my own.

I repudiate the mystery of myself.
I celebrate the opaque,
I enter the transparent
genius of the aeon.